Some people think it is better to have a dog than a child. A dog will wear anything you want them to without putting up a fuss. They will eat anything you put in front of them. They are always willing to show affection. They forgive you everything. They are never embarrassed to be seen with you. They will never run off to marry an out of work actor and they will always be home for the holidays. The bad side. Dogs won't take care of you in your old age. With children you have a fifty-fifty chance.
Monday, March 14, 2016
Monday, March 7, 2016
Beautiful
10:00 AM
Posted by Linda Henson
awesome, beautiful, creatures, decorate, fanned, peacocks, porch, product, sight, tails, trill
Peacocks are some of the most beautiful creatures on the earth. They have been used to decorate lawns and courtyards for centuries. When their tails are fully fanned it is an awesome sight. Then they leave their product all over your front porch and the trill is gone.
Thursday, March 3, 2016
What?
10:00 AM
Posted by Linda Henson
animal, barked, blank, cat, dog, elephant, feint, impressions, learning, meowed, nephew, talk
My nephew was learning to talk when he was doing animal impressions for me. He barked and said dog. Than he meowed and said cat. Than he made a noise and said feint. I didn't know what he was doing. Again he said feint and I was a complete blank. He gave me a look that said, How can you be so stupid, than said clearly, "Elephant!"
Thursday, February 25, 2016
B K
7:39 PM
Posted by Linda Henson
Burger King, burrito, cheese, complicated, egg, hash browns, onions, peppers, sausage, simple
A long time ago, Burger King started offering sausage, egg and cheese burritos. I thought it sounded good so I ordered one. It came with sauce. I didn't like the sauce so I started ordering the burrito without the sauce. Then one day I was told it didn't come with sauce. Praise be! Wait. I rejoiced too soon. Now the burrito came with onions and green peppers. I don't like onions or green peppers. So I started ordering the burritos without onions or peppers. Then I was told, the burritos no longer came with onions or peppers. Oh, I was happy. I was told hash browns came with the burrito and I thought I don't mind a side of hash browns. The hash browns were stuffed into the burritos. I don't want hash browns in my burritos. What I want is a plain sausage, egg and cheese burrito. I don't want sauce, onions, peppers or a pink umbrella. I want my burrito simple and uncomplicated. And that is the way I want my life. Simple and uncomplicated. Is that too much to ask?
Sunday, February 14, 2016
Happy Valentine's Day
From Aunt Bea and The Andy Griffin Show: There are only two kinds of conversation needed for a good for a marriage: coffee talk and pillow talk. They should both be warm and sweet.
Sunday, February 7, 2016
A Man
A man went to the Super bowl. When he found his seat he noticed an empty seat next to an older man. He asked the man why there was an empty seat. "My wife and I had tickets, but she died before she could use hers."
"I'm sorry. Wasn't there a friend who could have come with you?"
"I called everyone,", the man said. "They were all busy."
"What? Not one friend could come with you? What were they doing?"
"They were going to the funeral," the man said.
"I'm sorry. Wasn't there a friend who could have come with you?"
"I called everyone,", the man said. "They were all busy."
"What? Not one friend could come with you? What were they doing?"
"They were going to the funeral," the man said.
Monday, February 1, 2016
Eewh!!!
A mother walks into her kitchen and sees her five children quietly playing on the floor. When she gets closer she sees they are playing with the five of the cutest baby skunks ever seen. Knowing that skunks can stink up the place and her children she panics and screams, "Run! Run!" The kids all pick up a skunk and run in five different directions. The mother screams again. The kids squeezed their skunks in fear and skunks don't like to be squeezed. You know what happened. Let's just say, that house was no longer a pleasant place to live in.